What Do You 

Fear?

What I fear:

1.  reaching my hand into the disposal

2.  sleeping by myself when Mike is out of town

3.  spiders (just the BIG ones, the little ones are cute… for some reason)

4.  pulling a big hair ball out of the shower drain (I’m pretty good about not letting my hair go down in the first place) (thought you might have wanted to know)

5.  the dentist

6.  epidurals

7.  losing everything (pictures) off my hard drive

8.  scorpions (big and little ones, neither are cute.)

9.  scary movies like… The Ring, Sixth Sense, (I can’t think of the others)

10.  dying before seeing my grandbabies

11.  having a loved one die

12.  backing out of my driveway and looking at my mirror and seeing an animal or child I’ve hit.

13.  the kids’ school bus as it passes us by after the kids have gotten off.  Have heard way too many stories of kids being too close… and you know the rest.

Today I faced one of my fears.  I have been suffering with a toothache for OVER A YEAR now in my bottom right molar.  I haven’t eaten on that side for OVER A YEAR.  I have been putting off getting it taken care of for A LONG TIME now.   

One day last week I had severe pain in that area and knew there was no possible way of putting it off any longer.  So I went in to find that I needed a root canal!  I couldn’t be seen for a week though so Ibuprofen and Amoxicillin were my best friends.  I tried some Vicoden (sp?) but I was really loopy and did not have a clue what was going on around me.   Won’t be taking that when Mike’s not around!

So going back today for my root canal, that I have been so dreading and praying everyday will go well, I walked in… calm as can be, waiting and reading New Moon… again. 

It wasn’t until the dentist came to get me from the waiting room and told me to sit in that lay-down chair of his… I lost it.  My hands started shaking and when he asked me if I had any questions, all I could say was this, (pretty much all in one breath), “I have had SO MANY bad experiences in the past, I have SEVERE anxiety right now, nitrous NEVER works for me, I’ve NEVER had a dentist numb the area LONG ENOUGH before jabbing me with his needle, and I am scared TO DEATH right now.” 

I know… a mouthful.  I was literally choking back the tears.  I thought I was going to break down right in front of him and his two assistants.  Luckily, I didn’t.  He reassured me… then calmly told me it was going to be a long process.

”How long?”  I asked. (thinking around 3 hours or something)

Dentist:  “well, probably an hour and a half.” (better than 3 hours)

Then he asked me if I had any other questions, after he showed me what the process would entail.  I said something that was probably not something I should’ve said, but I needed him to tell me.

“I just HOPE you know what you are doing.  I need to HEAR that you KNOW what you are doing and that EVERYTHING will be fine.”

I can’t believe I said that.  I usually don’t speak my mind like that… never.  My mind was just going crazy on me and my nerves as well.

He of ‘course laughed and said, “I KNOW what I’m doing and you will be JUST fine.”

He was right.  The prick of the needle was totally bearable, I didn’t feel a thing after that except my left side getting way sore from keeping my mouth propped open with a mouth rubber thingy for so long.  I thought for sure I was going to feel him hit the nerve somehow in the middle of it all and I was going to sit up and knock everything everywhere.  (you know… like Nemo.)  I was so tense afterwards that my entire body was sore.  I didn’t realize until halfway through that my hands were folded together as tight as can be and that I hadn’t moved them an inch since the start. 

My prayers were answered.  Everything went great and I am now scheduled for Monday for my crown.  I guess I’ve just had my round of bad dentists when getting fillings and such.

When it was all over I wanted to give the man a huge hug and tell him I loved him, but thought it would be very inappropriate of me and just settled with telling him this was the best experience OF ALL dentist experiences. 

$799.00 later, I still have pain, bearable with my 4 ibuprofens I just popped in, and soon I’ll be throwing out another $900.00 for the crown.  Can you believe that?  So crazy I tell ya.  But thank goodness there are ways of fixing these problems and that my Mikey can work hard for my expensive mouth.  Otherwise, I’d probably be toothless and scary right now. 

Here is a pic that captured my VERY DRY LIPS and my way sexy crooked smile.  Not too bad.